Home Sweet Oddish Home!

 Thank Gawd Halloween is coming, because things are Oddish around here, and we need to fit in somehow!
You wont find a hand stitched needlepoint, on the walls of this home. "No Home Sweet Home" rugs. What you will find is Pepsi liter bottles, full of ugly grow a worms,and grow a monsters. Last week you would of even found a grow a lizard, but charlie got it, and ate his arms off, so we had to bury Earl. He will be sadly missed. His bottle sits on the counter top... empty. Only because, this mom could not find a replacement at the Walgreen's. Which caused me to have a grave side service, for a piece of plastic. A piece of plastic that was loved. Loved, like this stupid, rubber rat named Dewey. Dewey gets blamed for all that goes wrong. Dewey gets moved in strange places, to take blame for wrongs. Once, when Charlie first came to live with us, Dewey was caught sitting by some poo poo! Damn it Dewey! Eric, 20 used to have a friend named Bob, no one seen him, except Eric. That worried us a bit, yet, we excepted Bob as family. Then one day the bastard packed up, and left. He went to Canada, and never said bye, never wrote. I miss Bob. This house is full of stories.This morning i was told a story, while brushing Savannahs hair. It is a sad story! One of Savannahs friends, told her, she almost had twin brothers too. It all went bad, when one of her brothers in her mommy's tummy, ate the other brother. Savannah went on, and on, about how this child needs an x-ray. They need to see if he has a boy inside him, because he is a little bit chubby, and his belly looks squishy. Things are oddish around here, but that is OK . I couldn't imagine anything else! Everyday we grow, and morph into different, better people. Yesterday, Rick was introduced to Nicki Manaj , Super Bass, and the boobie shimmy. He liked it, he probably would of liked it better, if we weren't at the gas station, where other people could witness this, but this is how the Wilkintards roll! Charlie has now discovered his leg goes up, and he can pee without squatting. This isn't going well. Anything in the yard is fair game! Almost every morning my pillows for my outside furniture, is blown in the yard! Yesterday, we brought Ricks new Harley home.(The one with Betty Paige, in her nakedness painted all over it.) I drove behind him, in the precious Dodge Ram, i am not usually trusted to drive. I never usually crash his vehicles, unless i am driving something else. Let me just warn you, If you side swipe a Ford Truck, with a Chevy Suburban, it will put a big long whole in the bed of the truck! I learned this one through experience. I dont fear my husband of 24 years, i dont even sweat shit anymore. I went to the store, got home, walked upstairs, and said. " Rick, your damn truck has a big gaping hole on the side, I didn't know that could even happen, but it did!" He said. "Shut, up! Don't piss with me all the time." Then i told him my story, about how i was backing out of the driveway, and a dog ran out in FRONT of me!" He just shook his head, and excepted it. Back to the Harley Story. I followed my husband, in a button down dress shirt, Levis, and sketcher shape ups.. all the way home, just shaking my head. He couldn't wait to show the kids, this bike. When Savannah seen it, she covered her eyes, and ran. Zach said. " Holy shit! There are so many tits allover it dude, are you serious?" Noah ran, laughing. Eric is still in shock. I just except the stupidness of the situation. If it makes the man, less stressed, and happy...then so be it! I gotta go.. Charlie is puking! Serious!